THIS IS HALLOWEEN. THIS IS HALLOWEEN.

Best holiday ever. I know there’s a lot of Christmas fans out there, but when else can you dress up like a complete asshole, pervert, or creepster without being shunned by society? (If it was up to me, Asshole Dress Up Day would be every day, or at the very least, every Friday).

Today, freak out your boss, make strangers feel uncomfortable in public, and scare some neighborhood kids. I’m talking disturb them for life. Let your freak flag fly and enjoy Halloween to the fullest.

Here’s a song.