I am a Global Citizen.
I know this because I was told so just shy of 1,531 times this past weekend, standing in the middle of Central Park for the 2014 Global Citizen Festival. The festival united hundreds of thousands of people to help raise awareness about clean water and ending poverty by the year 2030. The festival lineup included Tiesto, The Roots, fun., Carrie Underwood, Alicia Keys, No Doubt, Sting, Jay Z and Beyonce (SURPRISE!), yet overall the event was a mixed bag.
Charity is good and stuff. (I think some wise somebody said that some time.) The cause is a great one and having so many artists and celebrities come together to support Global’s message was really quite amazing. Hugh Jackman, Connie Britton, Katie Holmes, Zachary Quinto, Ryan Reynolds and more showed face to help spread the good word. On a grande scale, the event should be praised because poverty es no bueno.
Tiesto started the event off with crazy energy and booming bass, which should have set the bar for energy pretty high. Sadly, that energy fluctuated throughout the night (through no fault of Tiesto’s), but the DJ’s “Wasted” and “Red Light” hyped us up while the sun fried us out (Uhh…Fall?). And mixing in a little Yeah Yeah Yeahs? Always welcomed.
Alicia Keys came out and sang some song about water, but girl can SING. The Roots played shortly after and as everybody in the world should recognize, they are groovy. They blend genres so easily and really brought the party, but only had enough stage time for 2-3 songs. We could’ve used more Alicia and more Roots in our lives. Hands down.
I’m not the biggest fun. fan (I think they kind of suck and I can’t figure out why anyone would choose fun. over, say, Grouplove – a far better and more eclectic Pop band), but credit where credit is due: singer Nate Ruess has a great voice and he hit all the high highs with ease. They’re a little bit cocky, but they were spirited, and played a mean cover of The Rolling Stones’ “You Can’t Always Get What You Want.” So hey. I saw fun.
I’m also not a Country fan (if you can even call her that anymore), but Carrie Underwood has sheer, unbridled talent. She gave Alicia Keys a vocal run for her money and some of her songs were surprisingly wowing. If anyone tells you that I was dancing to her most country of songs (something about cheating or cowboys or insert trite Country theme here), I will deny, deny, deny. But I didn’t hate it – and might listen to her sometime down the road. She sure is purty, too.
This may be partly biased, but once the sun went down and “Ladies and Gentlemen: NO DOUBT!” blared from the speakers, the crowd finally started to look alive. The kickdrum of “Hella Good” bitchslapped the sober attendees in the face (more on that later). Everyone was on their feet singing and dancing, and finally united in music. The band played singles from Tragic Kingdom and beyond, including a should-have-been-single: 2012 title track “Push and Shove,” the highlight for this long-time fan.
Gwen Stefani is known for her trademark cool; her personality and attitude make up for her vocal faults, forgotten lyrics, or lazy singing (at times). But no one commands a crowd like Mrs. Rossdale. When she tells you to jump (“Hella Good”), put your hands in the air (“Spiderwebs”), singalong (“Underneath It All”) – you comply with a gleeful smile on your face. You can try to resist, but she owns you.
Oh, and STING came out and played “Message in a Bottle” with the band. No big. HA! – I will never forget that performance.
The talent across the board was fantastic – even the acts I wasn’t excited to see, I ended up enjoying. Overall, however, the event proved to be a little on the lamer and tamer side. In between sets, we were slaves to long videos about poverty, world hunger, and the need for clean water to lower-income and third-world areas. We expected videos and speeches, but not to the degree of what was presented. Sets were even cut in the middle, with Carrie Underwood and Gwen announcing various celebrities or politicians to take the stage. As mentioned, I ain’t hatin’ on the charitable cause or donated time of these high-profile people, but the energy of the event was like being stuck in a 5 hours traffic jam. Start, go, start, go. It was hard to really rally and not want to take a nap at times.
Global Citizen was also preaching about abundance of food and water, when the festival was sorely lacking. Food ran out not even mid-way through the festival and the only thing available, as VIPs mind you, were brownies and a cheese box? Water at the hand-washing stations ran out before the first act even began, and the promised, free water was completely non-existent. And the kicker: there was no alcohol. At an outdoor festival. In New York City. All of this is extremely unacceptable and perhaps not worth the money VIPs paid – between $75 and $500+ a ticket.
Hooray for charity and celebrities and great live music, but as we watched videos about starving children and the importance of drinkable, clean water, I found myself wishing I had a nice sandwich, or perhaps some drinkable, clean water myself. And if they had charged us $10+ for a pint of shitty light domestic beer, everyone would’ve paid it, and the proceeds could’ve fed a lot of hungry, poverty-stricken “global citizens.”
Wasn’t that kind of the point?
In sum: If like me, you find your favorite band playing the Global Citizen Festival next year and you cannot miss it, you’ll have a good time. Just make sure you eat before going and, if you want to party, smuggle in some disco candy or something. Because it’s going to be a loooong, dry day.
Here’s No Doubt’s set, in full:
