As you all know by now (since I’m a total slacker-type blogger and not writing this until two days later), that BOB CROWLEY won Survivor Gabon! The 58-year-old physics teacher beat out Susie and Sugar in a 4-3-0 vote that shocked and appalled us all, I’m sure. And not because Bob won…but because Susie actually ended up receiving three votes. THREE. Wtf!?
So Kenny and Matty bit the big one. Kenny’s send-off was totally anticipated. Matty loses in a tie-breaking “build a fire” mini-challenge a la Stephanie and Brian from Palau. At the reunion, Probst gets on Matty’s case because it’s Survivor, and “fire represents life” as we all know. Probst is right. Turns out the Jury definitely would’ve given him the million. Matty is pretty much defeated by his own lack of firestarting ability. ‘Tis a shame!
Instead of doing a total recap of 3 hours of television, I’m just going to rile off my thoughts and questions regarding the whole event.
Sugar decides to give up. In a nutshell. Bob is now her new father-figure so she doesn’t answer a single question that the Jury asks her, and literally sits there. Doing nothing. So that Bob would get more votes. I totally understand and respect that she wasn’t going to beg the jury for votes. Totally commendable. But there were absolutely a few questions she could’ve and should’ve answered better. She did nothing to defend her bold moves in the game, and if you ask me, Sugar played the best overall game out of the final three. Although I still love you, Sugar, I feel stupid for rooting for you for so long. And we thought Amanda had the worst Final 3 performance ever, ugh.
Susie gets three votes. How? Why? Is the world ending? A possible Armageddon? The jury is fully to blame on this one. Had Kenny, Matty, and Crystal actually looked at game play as the essential factor for their vote, Sugar would’ve still lost but she would’ve garnered those three votes. “Outwit, Outplay, Outlast”. Sugar did just that. Susie did not. Kenny, Matty, Crystal: Way to be bitter losers and let your vote be a total waste of everybody’s time. Susie “tried”. Wow. Big deal, Suz. So did the other 17 FRIGGIN’ CASTAWAYS. B-o-o-H-o-o.
And one last time, guys! Everybody with me now! Corinne is a horrible, terrible, awful human being. Her family should be ashamed of her. She should be ashamed of herself. And CBS should’ve left that bitch stranded in Gabon post-production so that she could be eaten by an elephant. Yanno, if elephants ate people…
Corinne said to Sugar at the final Tribal: “You are an unemployed, uneducated leech on society. And the only thing I would vote to give you is a handful of anti-depressants so that no one else has to be subjected to your constant crying anymore. And maybe if you get some, then it would seem a little more sincere when you are crying about your dead father.”
Just when you start to think that Corinne can’t get any worse, she crosses a line that is so sickening and repulsive that my mouth was literally on the ground. Corinne can hate Sug’ all she wants. She can say she never wants to speak to the girl ever again. But implying that Sugar wasn’t sincere about grieving over her father / bringing up Sugar’s father at all was a comment that should confirm Satan’s decision to reserve a nice warm seat in hell for Corinne Kaplan. The word “bitch” doesn’t even do this vile woman justice.
Back to the positive: BOB WINS! Although he may not have been my first choice or two, I’m still totally satisfied that he took home the million (actually…the $1.1 million! Viewers awarded him with even more money!) And Gabon is now officially over!
I have to agree with Mr. Ross from EW.com: Gabon was a good season. A solid season. But it was no Borneo, no Micronesia, and not even a China.
Next up: We’re going to Brazil!
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHadtcxkpR8]
Survivor fans: See you in February!
Whenever Corinne was on screen during the reunion, my fellow Survivor lover, Tracy and I were just screaming the “C-Word” at the screen. Oh boy, do we hate on Croinne. And Randy sucks almost as bad. Two pathetic loser horrible wastes of skin. Sugar deserved some votes and yes I agree she played the best game of those in the final 3. Susie? WTF, man!?
Randy IS pathetic. So sad and downright pathetic, there’s no other word for him!
To call Corinne a pitiful human being would be an insult to human beings everywhere.
My drawing of her chrisillustration.blogspot.com
considering sugar said she’s having trouble going out in public without getting noticed, i’d be worried if i were corrinne. there are a LOT of people out there who not only hate her, but LOVE sugar and wouldn’t mind “accidentally” hurting someone who was such a bitch that the word seems meaningless now.
oh, my deep thoughts from the finale:
i noticed that, even though he’s cranky and mean, no one seems to HATE randy the same way they do corrinne. i think it’s because you can tell randy has been deeply hurt by people at some point in his life, which is what caused his misanthropic attitude. you feel like some therapy would make a big difference in him.
corrinne, on the other hand, is just spoiled and beYOND elitist. i truly don’t wish harm to her or her loved ones, but she NEEDS to have something bad happen to her to understand what’s actually important in life.
infamous – thanks for the comments! I totally agree about Randy vs. Corinne. You can tell that something huge went wrong in Randy’s life and that there seems to be more of a reason for his attitudes and actions. Corinne, not so much. Overall…it was a solid season though!